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Facing your perfectionism

April 26th, 2019

It was a leap for me to share this photo with you. I’m sure you can relate in your own way. I’m a perfectionist. And sharing this image of me with you feels VERY uncomfortable. You may wonder: Why? It’s perfectly fine.


It was a leap for me to share this photo with you.

I’m sure you can relate in your own way. I’m a perfectionist. And sharing this image of me with you feels VERY uncomfortable. You may wonder: Why? It’s perfectly fine.

Not for this perfectionist. I’ve tried to edit the photo quality, the way my hair looks, the way I’m standing. But, after a powerful coaching call this morning, I’ve decided to take the leap and share the photo as is in spite of my own perfectionism.

Why? Because my perfectionism holds me back from pursuing so many of the things I yearn for myself. And I no longer want my life to be governed by this imprisoning part of myself. So, I’m giving myself permission in a very public way to break my own rules and judgments.

What are the rules + judgments which are keeping you from your greatest desires?

Are you willing to give yourself permission to break them?

Photo by Melanie Gordon

In the spirit of transparency, here are some of the personal rules I’ve given myself permission to break:

• Professional status.
Midway through my journalism career, I consciously chose to switch into a support role from a front lines “in the field” role. The front lines role was wreaking havoc with my physical and mental wellbeing. But, I feared my whole identity would crumble and that I’d be judged by everyone around me for choosing a different life path. And some people did! But, what ensued for me was a way of living which is so much richer and meaningful than the rigid idea I had formed about my professional identity. What’s ironic today is that I never really left that work, it only evolved: Now, I get to coach others around their own professional identity, I consult with companies on improving employee wellbeing and I’m still a paid journalist.

• Work “ethic”.
I thought that I needed to burn out in order to earn what I wanted to support my lifestyle. Not true. Broke that rule! And, yes, still getting judged for it. Oh well! I’m earning more than I ever earned before. And, burnout is no longer an option.

• Food.
So much judgment from others with this one! I’ve learned over the years what my body needs to thrive and feel optimal and this means that certain foods need to be at a minimum for me. Extreme? Yes, to some. For me, this is a way of life and not a diet. I was fifty pounds overweight at one point and I don’t want to live in that body and in that way anymore. Oh, and on my 40th birthday, there was cake but I didn’t eat it, I didn’t want to eat it, and no one at the dinner table asked me to eat it.

Photo by Melanie Gordon

What rules keep you stuck in a limited way of living? Are you willing to give yourself permission to break them?

You can’t imagine the freedom that lies on the other side…

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